My Mockery Draft -Vol 1

by The Profiler on Jan 28, 2011 12:51 PM EST

So with all the Mock drafts I want to do the outrageous. I don't usually do a "mock" Draft as it where but this draft is off the wall. It contains the insane, enraging, stupid and Blasphemous. This is the ANTI-offseason plan. If you like this I'd keep it to yourself. We retain none of are RFAs in this....

FA- Ernie Sims, Terrell Owens, Dre Bly, Lendale White, Pat White

Round 1 - Trade Calvin Johnson and Shaun Hill to Carolina for the 1st overall pick the Lions grab AJ Green,WR,Georgia

Round 1- Julio Jones, WR, Ala- We still need that 3 reciver we grab him here walking out with the 2 best recivers in the draft.

Round 2- Allen Bailey, DE, Miami- We fail to resign Cliff Avril here is his replacement.

Round 3- TRADE- We send the 3rd round pick to the Dolphins for Chad Henne are backup plan for Stafford.

Round 4- Demarcus Van Dyke,CB,Miami- We still need a corner with Houston gone so we take are new corner here in the 4th round with the best guy still availible.

Round 4-TRADE- We give up are 5th for this year and next to move back into the 4th round with Tampa Bay. With Tampas 4th round pick we take. Daniel Thomas,RB, Kansas State

Round 6 no pick

Round 7- Best Kicker/Punter available

This is a FanPost and does not necessarily reflect the views of Pride of Detroit or its writers. FanPosts are valued expressions of opinion by passionate and knowledgeable fans.

Tweet Comment 26 comments | 1 recs |

Do you like this story?

Comments

I love it...

Would’ve been even better if we traded are second round pick for Albert Haynesworth.

BOBBY " BOUCHER " CARPENTER for PRESIDENT...

by SmittyJ on Jan 28, 2011 1:15 PM EST reply actions

lol

"Show me someone with an offseason and I'll show you someone in last place"- Ndamukong Suh

by The Profiler on Jan 28, 2011 1:23 PM EST up reply actions

Wow...

This was an absolute tragedy, but still could have been worse..lol

Honestly, it was good to see a “enlightened” mock for a change instead of the constant barrage with the usual picks.

I applaud you sir

by xanderjd on Jan 28, 2011 1:38 PM EST reply actions

Classic!

All men are created equal. Its just that some men are more equal than others....

by CapitolLions on Jan 28, 2011 1:56 PM EST reply actions

Best mock ever

But doesn’t Pat Whites baseball career really only make him a late season player in the vein of Bo Jackson. I mean he is so talented that it shouldn’t matter much but why don’t we sign an NBA or NHL player for the first part of the year to make sure that we don’t waste the roster spot.

by GTlions on Jan 28, 2011 2:00 PM EST reply actions

From now on

let’s only sign 3 sport athelete’s and expand the Lions to 3 major sports, we’d only have to pay the players one salary, but they play for all 3 teams.

It's turkey, Lions and Macy's. Any other combination is just ludicrous.

by Leonuro on Jan 28, 2011 2:50 PM EST up reply actions

Actually his baseball contract gives him an out if he gets and NFL offer

which isn’t likley but I heard he made sure he had an out if he were given another oppertunity

"Show me someone with an offseason and I'll show you someone in last place"- Ndamukong Suh

by The Profiler on Jan 28, 2011 3:13 PM EST up reply actions

My only beef with this is

Daniel Thomas. Really? He’s got power and speed, why would we want him in the 4th???

by rames on Jan 28, 2011 4:08 PM EST reply actions

I think most of the problem with him

is that his name consists of two first names. I read somewhere that you can’t trust people with two first names. You have to choose one first name. I think it could be corrected if he changed one of those names to be a proper last name like Daniels or Thomasson. Obviously, this is probably why he made it on a mock mock draft.

It's turkey, Lions and Macy's. Any other combination is just ludicrous.

by Leonuro on Jan 28, 2011 4:17 PM EST up reply actions

Hey, I have 2 first names....

Wait… I’m not to be trusted. You are right. Continue with your generalizations.

"Lemme Tell you why I have confidence in the long term future of this team... It's #9, That's why I have confidence in the long term future of this Team." - Jim Schwartz

by j16941 on Jan 29, 2011 2:47 AM EST up reply actions

lmao

Hey J, did you ever find those lamps for you Lizzies?

I was thinking, have you considered a heat blanket? Basically they are like a heating pad but much smaller and more energy efficient.

I like Wins, Cheese and I also Like Cookies. If you don't. Wow. :P

by joshsun on Jan 29, 2011 12:43 PM EST up reply actions

I found a site online and ordered 3 of the "Flunker" Brand Bulbs.

I’ll let you know how they work out when I get them. I’m pretty confident they will be better than what I got. Flunkers is the Brand of Lamp that I have, but for some reason Petsmart and Petco only sell the Lamps and Not the Bulbs.

I’ve never heard of a Heat Blanket, but I do have an Under Tank Heater, underneath the Terrarium. To be honest though, the Temp is not really the problem, I just need the lights for the UVA and UVB output.

Thanks for the help, I’ll keep ya posted.

"Lemme Tell you why I have confidence in the long term future of this team... It's #9, That's why I have confidence in the long term future of this Team." - Jim Schwartz

by j16941 on Jan 29, 2011 3:00 PM EST up reply actions

Cool

Good luck with the bulbs, having been the one to give you the advice, I hope they are more sturdy than our QBs. (ok, that was probably a little much but fun anyhow)

UVA and UVB, now I know why you need the bulbs and not the heater blankets.

Good luck and yeah, please let me know how they work out.

I like Wins, Cheese and I also Like Cookies. If you don't. Wow. :P

by joshsun on Jan 29, 2011 3:53 PM EST up reply actions