Profilers Mockery Draft

This is NOT a mock draft. In fact I hate your mock drafts all of you haha. Kidding...Or am I ? Anyway I decided it was time for me to once again make a mockery of the entire process. Ala Mel Kiper only my draft will be stupid on purpose.

1, Colts - Have two needs a new QB after cutting the great Peyton Manning and secondary help. Obviously with guys like Andre Johnson and Kenny Britt they really need a corner. Colts select the most "talented" corner in the draft. Janoris Jenkins

2. Redskins - Desperate for a franchise QB traded up just to get one. This guy is shooting up boards so fast he has passes Andrew Luck. Redskins take Ryan Tannehill.

3 Vikings - Needing help on offense take what some people are calling the best offensive player in the draft. Spielman ends up with a huge erection for an Alabama running back like so many people seem to. Vikings take Trent Richardson.

4. Browns - Need everything according to everyone. Why not take the safe offensive lineman pick and take Matt Kalil now the book end to Joe Thomas.

5. Bucs - Will go best player here whos not a QB. Bucs take Justin Blackmon as there new big star wide out.

6. Rams - Need to help Bradford out with some serious play making talent. Thats why they select David DeCastro the safest pick in the draft.

7. Jaguars - Looking for more offensive help the Jags will take RG III to add to the running game of MJD.

8. Miami / Arizona The cards trade up to nab Andrew Luck as he descends. Dolphins get there man though Kevin Kolb is the future of Miami.

9. Panthers - Desperate to land a corner back the Panthers select Riley Reiff. They actually trade there 7th for Asante Samuels.

10. Bills- Take saftey Mark Barron to pair with Byrd going forward. After deciding Claiborne was to smart to play for the Bills.

11 KC - This pick is easy. KC will take Michael Floyd after they decide they need a player on there team who can fight back when Jonathan Baldwin starts swinging.

12. Sea - After finding out Reggie Bush wasn't available Pete Carroll proves once again that 1st round is just words. By selecting Curt Cousins the QB he covets at 12 overall.

13. Mia - Now with Kolb at QB needs to get him some weapons. The Dolphins will take Kendall Wright at 13.

14. Cowboys - One thing the Cowboys need its corners but Jerry Jones can't pass on a chance to draft Quinton Copels, Can he play 3-4 hell no but thats not Jerry's problem thats all on Rob Ryan.

15. Eagles - looking to make up on last years blunder decide they should have 2 star middle linebackers just to make sure. They select Luke Kuchely

16. Jets - Really need to find a saftey and sense it may or may not be Tebow they will take Harrison Smith.

17. Bengals - Need a corner and with Alfonso Dennards recent arrest he's now qualified to be the pick.

18. Chargers - Shock the world and make the correct pick. Chargers take Chandler Jones to try and replace Merriman.

19. Bears - Chicago needs a DE possibly another receiver and an offensive lineman. Bears trade out of the first round when the deem " no player worth the pick"

20. Titans- Looking to replace Finnegan the Titans will take Stephon Gilmore at corner.

21. Bengals - Andy Dalton just soiled himself. The Bengals take Stephen Hill to play opposite AJ Green.

22. Browns - Picking again browns select Dre Kirkpatrick. When Holmgrem says " It was easy thats where the monkey threw the dart".

23. Detroit Lions - Mayhew laughing is ass off selects Morris Claiborne as the corner back they need so badly. Chris Houston fantasy value sky rockets.

24. Steelers - Dontari Poe the defense needs youth he's a good NT. He will be the Pouncy of the defense.

25. Broncos - Only one way to pick Manning needs O lineman. Broncos take Jonathan Martin as a right tackle.

26. Texans - No wide wide outs here to pick Andre Johnson is pissed. Rushes the stage to announce Tommy Streeter as the pick before anyone can stop him.

27. Patriots - Coby Fleener because now 3 tight end sets seem to be the next logical move.

28. Packers - G/Tackler Cordy Glenn is the pick. Sense there lineman are always hurt would be nice to have someone who can play more than one spot.

29. Ravens -Picking the under study to the great Ray Lewis Donta Hightower will be selected by Ozzie Newsome.

30 . SF - Alex Smith is a franchise QB this week but the decide next week dosen't look so bright and go with old man Brandon Weeden.

31. Patriots - Doug martin - Still throwing runningbacks hoping one will stick they try the kid from Bosie State.

32. NYG - They have it made at 32 they can select who ever falls here It's Whitney Mercilus DE from Illinios.

This is a FanPost and does not necessarily reflect the views of Pride Of Detroit or its writers.

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