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Rob Parker "Apologizes" in Embarrassing, Narcissistic Column

Just when I thought Rob Parker couldn't make a bigger fool of himself after yesterday, he has found a way to do just that.  Parker penned a column for the Detroit News today where he discussed the inappropriate question he asked Rod Marinelli in the press conference following the Saints game.  Parker did "apologize," but only because we didn't find his question to be humorous.  Even worse, Parker made the entire column about himself and how he and Rod Marinelli supposedly have this great relationship and friendship.  I will warn you, some of the things he wrote may make you want to punch a hole through the wall.  It is that bad.

On the surface, you might think it's adversarial. He hates me and I hate him. In reality, it's one built on mutual respect.

I respect what Marinelli is trying to accomplish as Lions coach, and he respects what I do as a sports columnist -- ask questions, tough ones, to get at the root of his team's woes.

Where do I even begin? 

First of all, Rob, I highly doubt Marinelli has an ounce of respect for you.  I hate to break it to you, but no one does.  Marinelli probably respects people like Mike O'Hara, Tom Kowalski, Nick Cotsonika, and John Niyo because they do their job.  They ask fair questions and report on the team.  You ask ridiculous questions repeatedly in hopes of getting a controversial answer to draw attention to yourself.  And no, asking why Joe Barry, who, in case you didn't know, is the son-in-law of Rod Marinelli (we get it, Rob), hasn't been fired yet five or six times in one press conference is not getting to the root of the Lions' woes.

It's almost a running joke. A news conference isn't complete unless I ask it.

This is where Parker really started to make his column about himself.  It is not a running joke.  Do you really think Marinelli finds it funny to get asked over and over why he hasn't fired his defensive coordinator?  Even if Marinelli's daughter wasn't married to Barry it would get annoying quickly.  That's why I can pretty much guarantee you that Marinelli has no respect for Parker.  Let's be real.  Parker has called for Marinelli to be fired each and every week for the last couple of months.  Would you respect someone that does that?  There's a difference between having an opinion and having a vendetta against someone.

Sunday, with my attempt at humor, I was trying to get Marinelli to lighten up, have some fun after a rough day.

Who knows, Marinelli, a straight shooter who never goes off script, might actually have given us a funny quote.

He didn't. My attempt failed.

You're right, Rob, your attempt did fail.  But it wasn't an attempt to get a "funny quote" as you claim.  You were hoping that Marinelli would say something controversial, just as you hope with every other question you ask.  You failed because Marinelli obviously has more class than you, which is why he simply moved on and didn't even acknowledge your ridiculous question.

And because of that, my attempt at humor may have seemed slighted, cruel, and even insensitive.

For that, I apologize.

Apparently, those watching replays of the news conference on TV didn't see it as humor.

I will say that Parker is great at spinning things and shaping his columns in a way that don't make him at fault one bit.  Just glancing at the column you see that he apologized.  However, if you continue reading, you will see that the next sentence shows what he really apologized for.  It wasn't about his failed "attempt at humor" that came off as insensitive; it was all about the fact that people watching on TV didn't find it funny.  That's what he was really "apologizing" for.

Often, after some of the most intense line of questioning from me, Marinelli and I have walked off to the side and chatted.

Just last Monday, after the presser to talk about the Lions' 31-21 loss to the Colts, Marinelli asked me if I was sick.

I told him no, "Why?"

Marinelli wondered why I didn't ask my normal tough questions about his team.

The Lions hung in against the Colts, and I wasn't just going to make a scene with hard questions just to make a scene. I'm not that kind of reporter. I want Marinelli to open up and share his thoughts.

That last line is perhaps the funniest thing I have ever read in my life.  Parker goes out of his way to say that he doesn't make a scene "just to make a scene," yet that's exactly what he did yesterday.  If you weren't trying to make a scene, you could have moved on to a new question or simply shut up altogether after Marinelli gave an answer for why Joe Barry hasn't been fired.  Repeating the question over and over had one purpose: causing a scene or controversy.  To say that "I'm not that kind of reporter" is an absolute joke.  Is that why you spread untrue rumors on TV every Sunday night?  Is that why you make up things that damage people's credibility?  Your only goal is to make a scene.

Marinelli has gone out of his way several times to offer words of encouragement. A month or so ago, he called me on my cell phone and told me I was one of the best at asking questions and that I shouldn't change because I hit a bump in the road.

It told me about the respect he has for me. I believe he knows I respect him as well.

I'm not even going to bother talking about this supposed phone call because it sounds so outrageous and spun that Marinelli's actual words are likely long gone.  I will say that Parker seems to have a problem.  I have only taken one psychology class at the University of Michigan, but after only one semester I can tell that Parker probably has a case of Narcissistic Personality Disorder.  Saying that the supposed phone call "told me about the respect he has for me" is just so narcissistic that I'm almost at a loss for words.  I can't even believe that he wrote that, and I am even more surprised that the Detroit News published that garbage.

Had Marinelli been upset Sunday, I would have been hurt because it would have meant he didn't see where I was coming from and what I was trying to accomplish -- humor.

Instead, Marinelli acted like he always does.

He took it and moved on.

For that, how can't you like that guy? I do. I really do.

That is seriously how Parker closed out his awful column.  He said that he likes the guy.  He really does. In fact, he likes the guy so much that he has called for him to be fired week in and week out.  He has also called for his son-in-law to be fired just as much, if not more.  That is definitely a sign that you like the guy.

You know, Rob, there's a difference between doing your job and being a jackass.  Doing your job sometimes requires tough questions.  That's fine.  Was it fair to ask Marinelli why Joe Barry still hasn't been fired?  Sure.  The Lions defense is terrible.  However, to ask it over and over and over again with the hope that Marinelli will say something that you deem controversial enough is flat out ridiculous. To ask the now infamous question that was only an "attempt at humor" was crossing the line.  Finally, to then write a self-centered column with the goal of trying to cover your ass is just pathetic.

I highly doubt Parker will be disciplined for his actions considering the Detroit News published this piece of garbage column, but I encourage you to boycott the Detroit News from now on.  Boycott their sponsors, don't read their paper, and don't ever go to their website anymore. 

Here on Pride of Detroit, I often link to the Detroit News when someone like John Niyo, the Lions beat reporter for them, reports something worth linking to.  However, it has gotten to the point where I am only going to link to the Detroit News' website as a last resort.  There are plenty of other sources out there that deserve a link much more than the Detroit News, which is why you shouldn't expect to see me talking about them on here anymore as long as Rob Parker works there. 

Like I said yesterday, how Rob Parker has a job is beyond me.  It's time that he face the music not just for his questions yesterday, but also for the numerous lies he has spewed on television in the past.  It's time for Rob to be fired and find a new city to punish with his embarrassing writing.

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