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Week 5 NFL picks against the spread: May the Caldwell be with you

Here are your Week 5 NFL picks against the spread.

Kevin Hoffman-USA TODAY Sports

It's Week 5, and the Detroit Lions welcome back Jim Schwartz to Ford Field (hopefully rudely), so I'm going to bring back a fissure staple of mine -- GIFmentary. A GIF can say a dozen or so words. I'm not feeling very wordy this week because the Tigers are on and I would like Jim Caldwell, the Lions and my GIF-filled picks to do the talking for me.

Congratulations to ezcmezgo for picking up the most wins in Week 4 with eight. Easy stuff.

On with it.

Vikings (+8.5) over PACKERS

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Texans (+6) over COWBOYS

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Texas forever.

LIONS (-7) over Bills

Jim Schwartz, say hello to the NFL's No. 1 defense! Sort of. Muahahaha. Cough. Burp. Kyle Orton.

Rule

TITANS (-2) over Browns

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COLTS (-3.5) over Ravens

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SAINTS (-10) over Bucs

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Falcons (+4) over GIANTS

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Rams (+7) over EAGLES

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PANTHERS (-2.5) over Bears

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Steelers (-6) over JAGS

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BRONCOS (-7) over Cardinals

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CHARGERS (-6.5) over Jets

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Chiefs (+6) over 49ERS

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Bengals (-1) over PATRIOTS

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Seahawks (-7) over REDSKINS

Giphy

LAST WEEK: 6-6

POD PICK'EM STANDINGS:

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