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Lions at Texans: What just happened?

Thoughts on the Lions' Week 8 loss in Houston.

Troy Taormina-USA TODAY Sports

I came back from Alabama for this? Week 8 is in the books and the Lions have crash-landed back to earth after a very fun three game winning streak. The Lions' 20-13 loss means that they have a heck of a chance of going into the bye under .500 after facing the Vikings next weekend. This game brought up a lot of thoughts in my mind. These are those thoughts.

Worst Caldwell performance ever

Jim Caldwell was in rare form Sunday afternoon. It seemed every decision he made was a dumb one. The two that obviously stand out were the clear fumble the Texans had that Caldwell almost challenged, but then saw his shadow and decided not to, and the ugliest onside kick I've ever seen in my life. The Lions defense was really bad. But were they "put the opposition in field goal range when you need the ball back to tie" bad? James is more likely fired now than he's ever been.

That defense by the way

The Lions defense had a terrible, no good, very bad day. No they didn't allow 50 points or anything like that, but they did manage to get held hostage by the worst offense in the NFL. Once again the Lions defense does for quarterbacks what no offensive coordinator could ever do: They make them good. Congrats Lions. You're the " is Brock Osweiler turning a corner?" team.

What was this offense?

After weeks of gunslinging and putting the ball wherever they wanted to, Cooter and the Lions decided to take the week off and run the old 'Joique up the middle' offense. The sad part is that Joique isn't on the team. But nobody has told James that yet. You really got the feeling that Joe Lombardi was watching this and smiling somewhere saying, "See that offense? I installed that."

I get that the Texans have the eighth-ranked defense in the NFL, but the Lions seemingly abandoned ship on what had got them to 4-3. No hurry up offense, very little deep plays, and too many run plays. It just wasn't very imaginative. If the Lions think they can head to Minnesota next weekend and bring this offense, they had better just stay in Detroit.

Let's see. Something good, something good. Oh!

Armonty Bryant really hasn't received enough credit this year. The Lions picked him up out of nowhere and he's played quite well since then. Lions fans should be happy that the front office has been really good at picking up square pegs over the past few years. Bryant and Kerry Hyder are proof of that.

Theo Riddick had himself a good return game. Eric Ebron played well too. It's really hard to find the light in today's dark game.

Your quarterback is just a quarterback again

Look I hate to be the one to say this. I really do. But Sunday's loss more than likely ends the media's love affair with Matthew Stafford. I don't think you see Stafford catch much of the blame or anything nonsensical like that. There may be a few "What's wrong with Stafford?" questions. Who knows? All I can say is that any talk about the Lions this week will probably not be good. I'm not saying it's right or wrong. But that's just my prediction as to what's going to happen.

I hate Fox

Ok that's a bit much. I don't really hate Fox. But they really tested me and so many others today when they forced me to watch the Redskins and Bengals tie each other in London. Ties by the way, apparently equate to this.

I understand why Fox continued to play the game. I shouldn't be mad. But I also understand why people get mad at their Applebee's waitress because they didn't want onions on their burger. So I'm just gong to be mad about it anyway. I'm going to be mad at the NFL, Cincinnati, Washington and Applebees. Because seriously, I saw you write "no onions" on the paper.

The good news

There really isn't any. I mean you could be happy that most other NFC teams lost on Sunday, particularly the ones that give the Lions trouble when it comes to the playoff hunt. The Bears will probably lose tomorrow. That'll be cool. Then the Lions are just one game away from the bye with a chance to come out on the other side at full strength with Levy, Slay and Ngata possibly coming back. Cheer up Lions fans. Go watch some Fresh Prince. The healing powers of Uncle Phil preparing for Soul Train works wonders.

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