It's that time of year again. It's time for Camp Crystal Lake's local slasher to go around camp and take out unsuspecting teenagers. Or it's time to watch Jason do this on the annual marathon of Friday the 13th movies you'll stop to watch five minutes of later tonight.
In honor of those movies you've seen 25 times each, today we pick the Detroit Lions' scariest moments in recent history. I'm talking about the type of Lions moments that were so scary that groans induced could be heard around the world. The kind that had you checking your closet and underneath your bed before you went to sleep that night. The kind you'd rather not relive. Let's jump right into it with a recent one.
The Hail Mary
This one makes many angry. It was just one of those moments that made you wonder why the football gods hated you so much. The Lions were seconds away from sweeping the Packers for the first time since 1991 when the refs called a face mask on Devin Taylor as time expired. Of course, the validity of the call will be disputed for many years to come, but nevertheless, the Packers were granted one last opportunity to make a play. I looked at my wife and said that I guarantee Rodgers throws a hail mary and the Packers win. Of course Rodgers did just that, and Lions fans collapsed to the ground in the fetal position and screamed in pain.
Rogers and Young
Neither pick was a nightmare when they happened; there was reason for excitement for both selections. How could anyone know that Charles Rogers would have a clavicle made out of glass and would do multiple drugs and pass out at an On The Border? How could anyone know that Titus Young would goes crazy out of nowhere and claim he was better than Calvin Johnson, then get arrested 50 times in two nights and pass out at an AT&T store? Well we know now. We also know that the guys responsible for these nightmares are no longer with the team. Silver lining.
Levy's Mystery Hip
Was it a simple hip injury? Or was it a Chilean parasite that could spew out of his body and kill everyone on a spaceship? The scary part is that nobody knew because the Lions refused to tell anyone. Then they refused to use the short term injured reserved tag on him and threw him back in the lineup before he should have been cleared to play. Now you have to wonder just a little bit if DeAndre Levy is able to play in 2016.
When the Lions had finally got themselves back into the playoffs, all that was needed to put a cherry on top was to go to Lambeau the following week and beat the streak. When word came down that the Packers would not only sit Aaron Rodgers but also a decent amount of their starters at the time, things looked to be set up for the Lions. In Rodgers' place was a young kid by the name of Matt Flynn; it seemed like a walk through for the Lions. 480 yards and six touchdowns later, the Lions had lost to the Packers 45-41. The Lions would get their revenge a couple years later, but the embarrassment still stands.
An American Beating In London
A year after a miracle win against the Falcons in London, the Lions traveled back to jolly ole England in need of a win. The team that stood in front of them was the hapless Kansas City Chiefs who were 2-6 at the time. They had also just lost Jamaal Charles a couple weeks earlier, so this is an easy win, right? Wrong. Alex Smith went out and had possibly the best game of his career, Charcandrick West made a name for himself, a wide receiver from the Chiefs caught a touchdown pass and Kansas City dominated the Lions 45-10. The NFL will not be sending the Lions to London for a long time after that beating. The silver lining obviously is that Martin Mayhew was excused by the team later that week.
This was such a small part of the 2011 season, but to me it made me angry and had me on edge every game that it happened in. Matthew Stafford had fractured his finger against the Denver Broncos. In true Lions' form, nobody told the media about it and Stafford all of a sudden started wearing gloves. The Lions went on to lose three of the next four games and Stafford's play had declined drastically. Stafford threw 10 interceptions in that four weeks. Looking back at it now, I suppose you can just blame the finger. But I still chose to blame the gloves.
The Un-burnable Jersey
This one is for the fans. Also, because it makes me laugh. After the Lions loss to the eventual Super Bowl Champion Denver Broncos on Sunday Night Football, Lions fans took to the street to show their anger by burning a Stafford jersey they spent $100 on. Blame who you want, it doesn't matter, but attempting to burn a $100 jersey is just dumb. Now I say attempted because these fans tried with all their might and multiple lighters to keep the jersey lit and could not. Then when it started to become embarrassing, they said "everyone spit on it!" After one person followed suit the video mercifully ended. If you were upset about that game, I hope you saw that video, because the hilarity immediately made me feel better.
What do you think Lions fans? What moments should I have added to this list? What scared you? Leave your comments below or come yell at me on Twitter @POD_Payton.