Ugh. I hate this team. I can’t even hide it. You all know why, too. The Packers are 100-70-7 against the Lions since their first meeting back in 1930. That’s pretty much it. That and because the Packers are the epitome of stock fraud and their legion of unwavering fans just can’t seem to see it. This scene from Wayne’s World always comes to mind when I think about their shareholders.
Look, we’ve done this all before. There’s a version of the Lions vs. Packers Random Stats piece available going all the way back to 2015. I’ve told this story a million times. So let’s do it a little differently this time.
Let’s play with the month of October instead of their entire rivalry. Okay, now that I’ve seen the results I’m not sure that I want to play this game anymore. Let’s just all go home and crawl under the blankets and wait there till Monday.
What’s that?... I have to?.. .I don’t think the people want to see that... It’s in my contract? Fine, I’ll do it.
I’ve been informed by POD management that I have to tell you that the Lions are 17-37-2 all-time against the Packers in the month of October. I’m sorry, guys, I don’t want to do this to you.
I am also in breach of contract if I don’t tell you that the Lions are 0-3 against the Packers when playing them on the seventh day of October. But don’t worry, they haven’t played on that date since Frankie Valli and The Four Seasons sang about some girl named Sherry in 1962.
I have some good news for you, I guess. The Lions are 10-10-1 against the Packers in October when they welcome the Packers into the confines of their home field. Sadly, this is what I looked like the last time the Lions beat the Packers at home in October.
To give you a preview of tomorrow's Random Stats, this is what I looked like the last time the Lions beat the Packers at home in October. pic.twitter.com/NO5QpJPtPb— Mike Payton (@POD_Payton) October 4, 2018
Form a single file line, ladies.
To the questions!
how many picks does Slay have against Rodgers?— Kenny (@KenyonKenny) October 3, 2018
Unfortunately not a single one. His only pick against the Packers came against Brett Hundley in Week 17 of last season. Maybe he’ll break through that glass ceiling on Sunday?
What's the longest pass ever completed at Ford Field?— My name's Matt, but call me Matub (@CallMeMatub) October 3, 2018
I hate you, my evil twin. I know you’re trying to bring up the Aaron Rodgers’ 61-yard Hail Mary from 2015, but that’s not even close. The longest pass in Ford Field history belongs to Mr. John Matthew Stafford. He threw an 87 yard-pass to Calvin Johnson against the Cowboys in 2013. Trust me. I was like totally there and stuff.
UPDATE: Apparently they say I was wrong. He was talking about air yards. Also Ben Roethlisberger threw a 97 yard pass at Ford Field last year. Well I say your mothers are all wrong.
Why does apple pie taste so much better with ice cream?— Thomas Payton (@ThomasP1775) October 3, 2018
I don’t like apple pie, Dad! You know that. Oh my god! Get out of my room! I’m trying to listen to my Simple Plan CD’s! You’re ruining my life!